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Inspiration – Big Dope

The Argument For Short Meditations

Most of the time when people talk about meditation, you hear a couple of things: · It’s really great and has tons of benefits · You should do it consistently, usually daily When this is what you always hear, it might surprise you to also hear that you might be better off doing short meditations […]

The Two Most Important Tools to Reconnect With Your Partner

We all experience conflict in our relationships. Whether it’s a recurring argument over something you and your partner just can’t agree on, or random distancing because of slight annoyances that pop out of nowhere, conflict is a natural part of any relationship. The only question is: how fast will we move past these hurdles? Will […]

Relationships Aren’t Easy, But They’re Worth It

I feel as though a lot of people who read my articles are under the impression that I am suggesting eventually someone is going to come into their life and every puzzle piece will simply pop into place. Doves will fly out from behind you, a chorus will follow you around on every date, you […]

A Simple Way to Address the Gap Between Attention and Intention

I know how it feels when you’re on the ropes, when life has gone sideways, and it’s hard to stay on track. Perhaps it seems there is no track. When you’re in new, ominous territory. Meanwhile, your days are still a flurry of hither and thither. You get to the end of it, and wonder […]

Stop Holding Onto Someone Who Is Already Gone

My ex-husband and I got married with the intention of one day having children. That was actually a thing after our very first date. He really wanted kids; I was unsure. He told me that if I wasn’t at least open to the idea of having children one day that we wouldn’t have a second […]

Having Children Will Change Your Marriage — and Not for the Better

My ex-husband and I got married with the intention of one day having children. That was actually a thing after our very first date. He really wanted kids; I was unsure. He told me that if I wasn’t at least open to the idea of having children one day that we wouldn’t have a second […]

What to Do When You Hit Rock Bottom

Making a list of failures is never an easy task. I mean, who wants to look at what went wrong? Who wants to recall the low points? Who wants to revisit the times you tumbled down the cliff and landed at the bottom, broken and bleeding? I do. Not because I’m a psychopathic sadist, but […]

If You Aren’t Building Together, You Are Growing Apart

I was having a conversation on relationships today and got pretty triggered by a comment from my partner, Mr. Brooks. He said, “I don’t believe relationships should be work.” His mother warned me at a dinner earlier last month of this belief he held; she and I had a laugh over wine at the thought […]

Let Go of Perfectionism and Find More Peace

In school, perfectionism is often rewarded, but in life, it can hold you back. Perfectionism served me well in the 1980’s American public school system. I checked and double-checked my answers on tests so I didn’t make careless errors. I turned in highly polished work and received bonus points for good presentation (usually by adding […]

How To Enjoy Your Social Life While Staying In Shape

There’s a tradeoff between fitness and socializing, but you can have it both ways. If we’re being honest, most of us aren’t into fitness for our health. Sure, if you’re obese maybe your doctor told you to lose weight. But for the rest of us, fitness is really about looking good. We want sixpack abs. […]